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Joke Home > Religious Jokes > Heaven's Gates

Heaven's Gates

Total Views: 12,047 Last Updated: 1/11/2003 Number Votes: 84 | Average: 1.21

A man comes home from work because he thinks his wife is cheating on him. He goes into the bedroom and catches his wife naked in their bed.

He says "Aha! I knew it! You're cheating on me and I knew it!" So he checks under the bed and in the closet. Nothing. Then he goes out to the balcony and finds a naked man hanging from the balcony railing. He Said, "I knew it! I knew it! You're screwing my wife and now I've caught you!" So he tries to kill him. He tries prying his fingers from the railing. It didn't work. So he gets a hammer and hits his fingers with it. He lands in the bushes. He didn't die. Then he takes the refrigerator and hurls it from the balcony onto him and has a heart attack from the stress and dies.

So he goes to Heaven finds himself in line with two other men. St. Peter says. "I've had a bad day. So only those of you with an interesting story are allowed into Heaven."

So the first man comes up and says. "I come home from work because I know my wife's having an affair. I find this naked man hanging from my balcony. I know he's screwing her. So I try to pry his fingers from the railing. He doesn't die. Then I take a hammer and hit his fingers. He lands in the bushes and doesn't die. Then I take the refrigerator and throw it off the balcony on him and he finally dies. Then I have a heart attack from the stress and die."

St. Peter says: "That's very interesting. You're in. Next!"

The second guy comes up and says: "I'm doing Kung Fu on my balcony. I like to do it in the nude because I feel less constricted. I fall.  I miss my balcony but luckily I land on the balcony of the guy under me.  He comes out and accuses me of sleeping with his wife. He tries to pry my fingers from the balcony railing and fails. Then he takes a hammer and hits my fingers. I land in the bushes. Then he takes a refrigerator and drops it on me. I die and end up here."

St. Peter says: "That's interesting. You're in."

So the third guy comes up and St. Peter says. "This had better be good."

The third guy says. "So I'm banging this guy's wife, and when he comes home, I hide in a refrigerator..."

"I've heard enough... you're in."

Religious Jokes > Joke 23 of 66 in the Religious Jokes category.
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