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Blonde Jokes

Q: what did the blonde say when asked if she'd ever been Picked up by 'the fuzz'?
A: 'no. But i've been swung around by the tits.'

Q: what did the blonde say when she knocked over the priceless vase?
A: A "it's ok daddy, I'm not hurt."

Q: what did the blonde say when she looked into a box of Cheerios?
A: "oh look! Donut seeds!"

Q: what did the blonde say when she was trying to impress the physicist?
A: "why, i just love nuclear fission! What do you use for bait?"

Q: what did the blonde think of the new computer?
A: she didn't like it because she couldn't get MTV.

Q: what did the blonde's mom say to her before the blonde's date.
A: if you're not in bed by 12, come home.

Q: what did the blonde's right leg say to the left leg.
A: nothing - they've never met.

Q: what did the really dumb blond say when someone blew in her bra?
A: thanks for the refill.

Q: what do a blonde and a good beer have in common?
A: they both go down easy.

Q: what do a blonde and an instant lottery ticket have in common?
A: all you have to do is scratch the box to win

Q: what do a blonde and presdient gorbachev have in common?
A: they both got fucked by 10 men whilst on holiday.

Q: what do a blonde and your computer have in common?
A: you don't know how much either of them mean to you until they go down on you.

Q: what do a bowling ball and a blonde have in common?
A: chances are they'll both end up in the gutter.
A2: you can pick them up, stick your fingers in them, and throw them in the gutter and they'll always come back.

Q: what do a moped and a blond have in common?
A: they're both fun to ride until a friend sees you on one.

Q: what do blonde virgins eat?
A: baby food.

Q: what do blondes and cow-pats have in common?
A: they both get easier to pick-up with age.

Q: what do blondes do after they comb their hair?
A: they pull up their pants.

Q: what do blondes do for foreplay?
A: remove their underwear.

Q: what do blondes do with their assholes in the morning?
A: pack their lunch and send them to work.

Q: what do blondes say after sex?
A: thanks guys.
A2: are you boys all in the same band?
A3: do you guys all play for the same team
A4: that'll be $5.

Q: what do blonds and spaghetti have in common?
A: they both wriggle when you eat them.

Q: what do peroxide blonds and black men have in common?
A: they both have black roots.

Q: what do UFOs and smart blondes have in common?
A: you keep hearing about them, but never see any.

Q: what do you call 10 blondes at the bottom of the pool?
A: air pockets.

Q: what do you call 10 blondes standing ear to ear?
A: a wind tunnel.

Q: what do you call 15 blondes in a circle?
A: a dope ring.

Q: what do you call 20 blondes in a freezer?
A: frosted flakes.

Q: what do you call 4 blondes lying on the ground?
A: an air mattress.

Q: what do you call a basement full of blondes?
A: a whine cellar.

Q: what do you call a blond mother-in-law?
A: an air bag.

Q: what do you call a blond with a bag of sugar on her head ?
A: sweet fuck all...

Q: what do you call a blonde between two brunettes?
A: a mental block.

Q: what do you call a blonde golfer with an IQ of 125?
A: a foursome.

Q: what do you call a blonde in a tree with a brief case?
A: branch manager.

Q: what do you call a blonde in an institution of higher Learning?
A: a visitor.

Q: what do you call a blonde lesbian?
A: a waste.

Q: what do you call a blonde on a waterbed?
A: cherry float

Q: what do you call a blonde touching her toes?
A: a brunette with bad breath.

Q: what do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells?
A: pregnant.

Q: what do you call a blonde with 90% of her intelligence gone?
A: divorced.

Q: what do you call a blonde with a dollar on the top of their Head?
A: all you can eat, under a buck.

Q: what do you call a blonde with a runny nose?
A: full.

Q: what do you call a blonde with e.s.p. and p.m.s.?
A: a know-it-all bitch.

Q: what do you call a blonde with half a brain?
A: gifted!

Q: what do you call a blonde without an asshole?
A: divorced.

Q: what do you call a brunette and three blondes on a corner?
A: you don't, you see if you've got 3 condoms.

Q: what do you call a brunette with a blonde on either side?
A: an interpreter.

Q: what do you call a dumb blonde behind a steering wheel?
A: an air bag.

Q: what do you call a fly buzzing inside a blonde's head?
A: a space invader.

Q: what do you call a room full of blonde women with yeast infections?
A: a whine and cheese party!

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